Nickelback's Not So Bad

Fifty million albums sold worldwide

Eleventh best-selling musical act of all time

Thirty-two awards among their accolades

Billboard's most successful rock group of the last decade

But these titans of rock, so relentlessly mocked

It's time to cut them slack

I'm talking about a band called Nickelback

(uh! hey!)

Nickelback's not so bad

(uh! hey!)

Nickelback's not so bad, huh!

The man who owns the label

That I'm signed to today

The man who makes me able to make a living this way

He gave me a record deal

And I think that I should add

That his last name is Kroger and his

First name is Chad

And on an unrelated note

By no means contractually obligated

Pursuant to subsection 14.5 of my recording contract

Nickelback's not so bad

(hey!)

Nickelback's not so bad

(uh! hey!)

Nickelback's not so bad

They saved my career right before I started selling crack

Who can you thank for that?

Nickelback

Nickelback!

Chad took me out on a boat

He took me out on his boat

Goddamn it was a real nice boat

We looked at the stars, we talked a lot

About music and life, we smoked some pot, he said

I support you and I wish you the best

You're worthy of love and I love you so

Here, have another ten thousand bucks

To write a song about your asshole (asshole)

I know for a woman it's hard out there

I really respect what you have to share

I know some people like to put you down

They don't like your cursing or your country sound

But think of the folks who love the way

You make 'em smile on a long, hard day

Everybody has their preference

And that's why music is the best

But when they succeed, they wanna rip on you

Even if millions are loving you

And sure, we might have been overplayed a little bit on Canadian radio...

I realized he was just talking about himself

But most of it was relevant

So I listened to how he felt

He said

You can let someone's cynicism

Keep you from the joy of listening

Even though we became shorthand for bad band

We still rock out the best we can

'Cause there is more in finding the good

In the things you never thought you could

I said, that's so profound, Chad

Nickelback's not so bad

(uh! hey!)

Nickelback's not so bad

We gotta stop this Krogerphobia

Nickelback's not so bad

We gotta scourge the planet of all who hate

Music in their hearts

Wait, what?

Their blood will be spilled in the name of rock and roll

Murdering the wicked and sparing the righteous

Okay, Chad, I think you even wanna reel it back a little bit

Fuck you, I can do whatever I want

I'm Chad fucking Kroger

Now get back to work, you stupid bitch