Fifty Shades of Grape

Oh, too much Malbec last night…

Now I’m feelin' rough, yeah, not quite right.

Sunglasses on, phone in my hand,

But it’s playin’ hard to understand!

Last night was wild, gossip with my friends,

Malbec flowin', we didn’t know when to end.

Laughin' loud, spillin' secrets all night,

But this mornin’, oh, I’m feelin' the bite.

Sunglasses blockin' out all the pain,

But my phone? It’s messin' with me again!

Sure need my sunglasses today,

Can’t unlock my phone, won’t recognise my face.

Sunglasses on, head poundin' slow,

Oh, I just need my phone to go!

Tryna text my girls, can’t make the call,

‘Cause this screen won’t move, not at all.

Facial recognition just won’t play,

When I’ve got these shades, keepin’ out the day.

I need my caffeine, but I’m locked out,

That last glass? A mistake, no doubt!

Sure need my sunglasses today,

Can’t unlock my phone, won’t recognise my face.

Sunglasses on, head poundin' slow,

Oh, I just need my phone to go!

I’m swipin’, tappin’, but it’s no good,

Should’ve stopped that Malbec, wish I could.

Next time, I’ll know when to call it quits,

But right now, I’m feelin’ like… shhh!

Sure need my sunglasses today,

Can’t unlock my phone, won’t recognise my face.

Sunglasses on, head poundin' slow,

Oh, I just need my phone to go!

Yeah, I’ll make it, I’ll pull through,

But next time, I’ll stop at a glass… or two!

Sunglasses on, oh now I know,

Gotta slow it down if ya wanna use your phone!