Behind Closed Doors

These are dangerous times

When salons are almost crimes

So careful what you share beyond these walls

Out there a thunder hums

As the Inquisition comes

But here at Gretchen Wagner's

Your sanctuary calls

Good evening, my friends-my curious croissants! Welcome! Together, we've kept our little city of Hertz safe from the Inquisition. Outside, the world is raging and burning, but here in my home, you can...

(sung)

Say what you feel

Feel whom you'd like

Anything goes

Here in my reich

Safe in my home

Home in my den

Do what you want

Then do it again

In here the universe is yours

So trust me, you're safe behind closed doors

In Mainz the Prince Archbishop Peter wages his bloody Inquisition

Men and women are burned every day!

And right here in Hertz the Bishop Francis is preaching that our Salon is really a coven of witches!

Call me a witch

Which I'll refute

You're on the hunt;

I know your route

I am the prey

Pray that it's quick

When it goes in

I'll own the stick

Believe each piece of me is yours

But I know my heart's behind closed doors!

The bishop Francis goes on and on about the evil that has penetrated our city!

He says there's dangers around every crumbling curve and corner!

His sermons about the depth of our ladies' necklines and the size of our gentlemen's codpieces have one goal: He wants to bring the Inquisition to Hertz!

The Inquisition's coming and it's picking up its pace!

But the new Baron says he won't allow the Inquisition into Hertz!

But in his new position will he hold onto his place?

Karl? Does this codpiece showcase things well?

The Baron is a baby, can he even keep it up?

Tell us what you're doing in his chambers

Here and now!

Tell us ever single tiny detail

Then show us how!

There! You see, my sticky strudels? The very heavens compel to keep it to myself!

Gretchen, cut the bullshit!

Tell us what you're thinking now!

Ah yes, thinking! That's why we're here. Hilda, Agnes dear, what is our first reading tonight?

Aristotle

Wonderful. Who would like to start?

(sung aside)

Sometimes late at night there's a lonely girl

Hiding from the shadows of the day...

Now that we're here

Hear what we say

Feast on our facts

We're here all day

Lap up our wine

Whine all you wish

Empty your fears

Come taste my fish!

Chouquettes

The thinking world is yours!

But only in here behind closed doors!

Hilda. I've got to run outside for a moment

What?

They're here!

Who?

I'll be back!

Out there those who run the Inquisition

Say we're wrong

In here we can read and challenge thinking

So join our song!

Shhh...

Follow your nose

Know where to rest

Sniff out the path

Come be our guest

Seek out the way

Weigh all the facts

Broaden your mind

Then, come relax

In here the thinking world endures

But only when kept behind closed doors!

Karl, the umbrella! My codpiece!

The heavens align

Follow that star

Chart out your course

Hide who you are!

One you in here

One you out there

Pick up a mask

Choose which to wear!

Frau Faustus -

How do you know who I am?

Let them think the face you wear is yours

Remove it!

When you're behind closed doors!