Cucumber Number (Remastered)

Stop muckin' about and gather around

I'll sing about the fruit makes world go 'round

And in the garden of Eden, Eve started the fall

But the fruit that she fancied weren't an apple at all

It was Adam's cucumber (sing the song)

'Ee a great cucumber (two feet long)

A massive cucumber (big and strong)

Fig-leaf cucumber (come and do the cucumber number)

In a cucumber frame one cucumber grows

And it stretches from m' knees up to my nose

It'll fill up your belly make you feel alright

You can gobble the fruit each and every night

Delicious cucumber (in the garden)

'Ee a monstrous cucumber (beg your pardon)

Nice firm cucumber (such a hard 'un)

Enormous cucumber (come and do the cucumber number)

Now down by the Humber

The wife of a plumber

She did the rhumba

On my cucumber

She went and got her neighbours

And a sister or two

And the district nurse and they all said

"Ooh! look at that cucumber" (what a size)

What a fat cucumber (satisfies)

Romantic cucumber (should win a prize)

Gigantic cucumber (come and do the cucumber number)

My fruity friend amused them so

So I got m' cap and jacket getting ready to go

I said "Did you like my big cucumber?"

They all said "Ooh, make your cucumber do one more number"

Trusty cucumber (show them how)

Lusty cucumber (I did and how)

'Ee lovely cucumber (goodbye now)

Good gracious cucumber (goodbye now)

Champion cucumber (goodbye now)

Natty dread cucumber (goodbye now)

Cucumber in-a Babylon (goodbye now)

Oh what a lovely cucumber (goodbye now)

What a beautiful cucumber (goodbye now)

What a smashing cucumber (goodbye now)