My Man O' War

I got myself a military man

And now I'm almost in hysterics

He has me living on the army plan

You'd think my father was a baron

It's so peaceful when he's gone

But when he's home, the war is on

My flat looks more like an armory

Takes all his bugles when he calls me

And may keep drilling me constantly

He's my man of war

When he advances, can't keep him back

So systematic in his attack

All my resistance is bound to crack

For my man of war

He never misses when he brings up his big artillery

Bullet-like kisses that hit the mark with such rapidity

His operations always increase

It seems like his movement will never cease

At night, he always deserves the peace

He's my man of war

I'm always daring the battle's brunt

Crazy for action, he's on the hunt

You should have found him right at the front

He's my man of war

Stole my trench, and he's not afraid

His bayonet makes me cry for aid

And oh, how he handles his hand grenade

He's my man of war

If I'm retreating, he goes around

And gets me in the reel

He keeps me pleading up like a park

Hail, victory is near

Now, when he turns his machine gun loose

Then I surrender, for there's no use

He makes me put up my flag of truth

That's my man of war