Who Would've Thought?

Who would've thought This subhuman sublet With an ego the size Of the national debt Would live up to his hype But he isn't my type Who would've thought I'd subdue and disarm Her disdain and contempt With the force of my charm She'd resist if she could I must really be good Why didn't I see it coming? Why didn't I have a clue? I suddenly fell like humming And I must put a stop to this soon I can feel that she's changing her tune Who would believe I'm enough of a fool To be taking the plunge After draining the pool We could learn to be friends But that's right where it ends All that I know Is that just down the hall In the very next room Through this paper-thin wall There's a creature I hated I can't wait to wake up and see Who would have thought that This nightmare This wonderful blunder Could happen to me Who would have thought? Who would have thought it Would take them so long I was sure of last week And last weekend was wrong This is totally cool That's cause you won the pool When do you think They will cut to the chase Well, his odds have improved Since he got to first base And he's coming on strong So it shouldn't be long This couldn't be more outstanding We hang on their every move (We hang on their every move) It's very much like "Knots Landing" Will he charm her right into his palm? If he doesn't she isn't my mom What happens next Could be anyone's call We're depending on you With your ear to the wall To turn into a spy, to be one of those sly little elves Till we're grown, on our own, and are prone to find Romance Ourselves Who would've thought? Who would've thought? Who would've thought?