i hate that i don’t hate you

Every beat that I play through my headphones reminds me of us

I know I need help and I hate that I think of you, I hate I'm a stranger to love

I hate that I gave you this power, I'm withdrawing from you like a drug

I need to move on but the problem with that is im trapped inside of what we was

I think i need therapy, maybe prescriptions i just wanna feel like myself

I don't wanna think of you, don't wanna dream of you, i need to distract myself with somethin' else

Somethin' to numb me, just make me feel nothing 'cause, nothing i do seems to help

I'm so sick of drinkin' and sinking in sorrow, while your livin happy with somebody else

I just feel like I'm crazy, It's been a year and I think of you

I lay in my bed in the dark when its late, and I think about, "what if I never meant shit to you"

What did I mean to you, how'd you forget what I did for you?

How'd you walk out after years of us lovin? How'd you forget all the things that we been through?

How'd you forget it, how'd you forget we was happy?

Maybe, one day, I'll look back at the songs and I won't feel like it ever happened

Maybe one day I can love again 'cause of lately, my heart has been absent

Im tryna process the pain everyday, it just feels like it's stagnant

How many songs can I write about you? How many times will it break me apart?

I can wipe all the tears on my face, but I can't wipe the pain in my heart

I can drink you away in the dark, I can pray to the lord to restart

But I just can't forget how you did me, 'cause I live everyday with the scars

You were my everything, I wasn't yours, that's probably what hurt me the most

One day you love me we plannin forever, the next thing I knew is you don't

The next thing I knew I'm alone, I'll never let anyone close

I thought that love last forever, but you showed me now that it won't, fuck