If Only

I am scared of Scared of What I'll find Living Living In a toxic mind Kinda deadly To my self esteem Can you hear me? But it makes me kinda lonely If only, If only, If only i'd change I try but then there's only grey around me If only, If only, If only i'd change If only if If only if If only If only if If only if If only Go Ahead Why Don't you Punish me Cause silence Brings out Brings out The worst in me If only if If only if If only If only if If only if If only It's like a drummer is beating inside my chest I used to think that a healer's a cigarette I only want a single thought Just give me a single thought Just give me a single thought Without regret It's like a drummer is beating inside my chest I used to think that a healer's a cigarette I only want a single thought Just give me a single thought Just give me a single thought Without regret But it makes me kinda lonely If only if If only if If only When there's only grey around me If only if If only if If only But it makes me kinda lonely If only if If only if If only When there's only grey around me If only if If only if If only But it makes me kinda lonely Again and Again and Again and Again When there's only grey around me Again and Again and Again and Again