KEH

Survival is insufficient, I'm trying to glisten but Come to find I'm imprisoned by a divided existence Admired admission, I don't aspire to be relatable Satisfied in my ways while I tire of a human race of fools A dispassionate pundit reporting with seemly detachment The daily parade of lunacies that constitute the news I refuse to be infused or be imbued with a tude that would Allow me to construe this world as anything but a ruse Prince Pred, I pen prose so impudent Pack punch more powerful than the most prominent pugilist Press play to purge a persona so pusillanimous and Spit potent panoramas with extravagant animus Proud parent of bold and arrogant fantasies All standard to manage the terror of inadequacy Pure agony established and masquerading as vanity Most my niggas got families when I can barely handle me So acclimated to dimming my light so I could Fortify these walls and hide in plain sight but The need to be liked is a dangerous plight Solidifying your run from the fight to choose flight Into the darkness and out of the light It's straight from the bottle I imbibe with no chill It's my right to conceal when this life gets too real so I will Drink to my fill so I can (kill Evin Hill) Intoxication was the prime directive to disconnect and Perceive the essence of everything through lenses mad corrective Unprotected as the walls I'd erected collapsed into a Deceptive veil of effectiveness obscured by pure intentions All needs provided and anxieties tranquilized, I'd Vanquished my frightened side through dampening disguise I can't override that which I am, but I can tarnish my Temperament temporarily through liquid layers of artifice Hard to exist when all I can recall is all the damage and Then escape then the blackness I lather rinse and repeat it's just a Face I put on to meet the faces I meet so when I Fall on my face inevitably I won't taste the defeat, ah Eventually tried to remedy the obscenity when it Registered I hadn't made a new memory since 23 I chose different but the ghost stayed with me and on Slopes so slippery, my control soon lifted So acclimated to dimming my light so I could Fortify these walls and hide in plain sight but The need to be liked is a dangerous plight Solidifying your run from the fight to choose flight Into the darkness and out of the light It's straight from the bottle I imbibe with no chill It's my right to conceal when this life gets too real so I will Drink to my fill so I can (kill Evin Hill) So far away I'm sure I won't bounce back My mind is now just a hell-scape with a dope soundtrack Call me peak person unserious, habits so deleterious Actual fits of fury emerge through frustrated teary eyes Rap slick, insidious, talented from the giddy up Fractured mentality manifests my image as hideous Delirious with my yearning in search for something real I'd rather suffer fear than worry bout how you fuckers feel I don't do it for this listens or the homage I do it cuz I'm dying inside and it's the only way I can process So I'll always keep it honest from artist to arsonist Gassing you up with knowledge so as to burn down your college Eyes to the mirror as I seek to forgive, realizing I've been too hard on myself and I just want to live So with desire revealed and new psyche instilled I'll Place this ink on my quill so I can (kill Evin Hill) I remember damage Then escape Then adrift in a stranger's galaxy for a long time I am at my best when escaping But I'm safe now I found it again My home I have found you nine times before Maybe ten And I will find you again I feel this again for the first time I have a job to do And then you will ask What is my job Not to survive because survival is insufficient I don't want to live the wrong life and then die You know your endpoint when you reach it But I have a job to do I still Have a job to do