God's Up To His Tricks!

There’s a magic boy and his name is God

He sits up on a cloud and gets down to his job

He says, “okay, my children! Who wants bliss?”

And then he cracks his big old knuckles

And God gets up to his tricks

Let’s make the wind blow the snow around

Deck the halls

Let’s fill the childrens’ ears with Christmas sound

Because I am God

I am real, I am real, I am real, I am real

And I’m feeling some type of way

Ooh, God you got up to some fabulous

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, tricks today

But did you know that God can also be a bitch?

He likes to bring a tragedy at bad times

And be like, “you’re gonna actually lose your whole home!”

And then nothing good happens

You just lose your home, he says

Let’s send a phone call with weird news about your mom’s health (ugh!)

Let’s kill the family dog so suddenly because life is suffering

I am real, I am real, I am real, I am real

And I’m feeling my oats today

Ooh, God you got up to some nasty little

Freaky daddy, ooh, tricks today!

Here we go!

Sometimes God can send a plentiful blessing

God can make us say (hey, hey, hey, hey)

Sometimes God can try to fuck up your whole life

God can make us say (oh, fuck!)

But we are grateful for everything he does equally

I am a person who actually believes this

And in every election I reliably vote

Let’s sing the sing songs and dance the dance

But stop to pray

Say thanks for water and thank youl for

That thing where you get sudden intense rectal pain

He is real, real, real, reel

And feeling some type of way

Ooh, God you got up to some incredible tricks today

Ooh, God, you stupid bitch!

You got up to some tricks today