Ballad of a Thin Man (Live at the Royal Albert Hall)

You walk into the room

With your pencil in your hand

You see somebody naked, and you say, "Who is that man?"

You try so hard, but you don't understand

Just what you will say when you get home

'Cause something is happening here

But you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?

You raise up your head and you ask, "Is this where it is?"

And somebody points to you and says, "It's his"

And you say, "What's mine?", and somebody else says, "Where what is?"

And you say, "Oh my God, am I here all alone?"

Something is happening, but you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?

You hand in your ticket, and you go watch the geek

Who immediately walks up to you when he hears you speak

And he says, "How does it feel to be such a freak?"

And you say, "Impossible," as he hands you a bone

Something is happening here, but you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?

You have many contacts among the lumberjacks

To get you facts when someone attacks your imagination

But nobody has any respect anyway, they already expect

You to give a check to tax-deductible charity organizations

You've been with the professors, and they've all liked your looks

With great lawyers, you've discussed lepers and crooks

You've been through all F. Scott Fitzgerald's books

You're very well read, it's well known

Something is happening here, but you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?

Sword swallower comes up to you, and then he kneels

He crosses himself, and then he clicks his high heels

And without further notice, he asks you how it feels

And he says, "Here's your throat back, thanks for the loan"

You know something is happening, but you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?

Now you see this one-eyed midget shouting the word "Now"

And you say, "For what reason?" and he says, "How?"

And you say, "What does this mean?" and he screams back, "You're a cow

Give me some milk or else go home"

And you don't know what's happening, you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?

You walk into the room like a camel, then you frown

You put your eyes in your pocket and your nose on the ground

There ought to be a law against you comin' around

You should be made to wear earphones

'Cause something is happening, and you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?