He's never been the polyamorous type
Or wanted somebody just for the night
On first dates he's always polite
And he draws the line at holding hands
Spends his nights writing loving long letters
While we're out in chains and leathers
All he wants is forever and ever
It can't be that hard to find
Spare a thought for the last romantic
He's got no time for your deviant antics
He's not versed in love semantics
He's only got eyes for one
He's only into monogamy
Turns his nose up at role play
Thinks its wrong to swing both ways
Cause his cheeks are too clenched to try
(And he says)- bizarre geometric affections
Are good for nothing but infections
He wrote in the personals section
Are there any good girls left
Spare a thought for the last romantic
He's got no time for your deviant antics
He's not versed in love semantics
He's only got eyes for one
His new girlfriend says he's not like most guys
You can tell he's sincere by those big puppy eyes
So what if he always cries
And after two minutes he's done
(But lately)- he hasn't been able to thrill her
His ice cream is too 50 shades of vanilla
And if he could only fill her life
With more exciting times
She was caught by the last romantic
Now she's so bored that she can't stand it
She's becoming somewhat frantic
And started thinking that she's done
Spare a thought for the last romantic
Never tried all our deviant antics
He's not versed in love semantics
He's only got eyes for one
He's only got eyes for one
