Maladapted

Running out of reasons To tell myself for the things I can't explain Dwelling on the moments I keep replaying in the hopes that maybe they'll change Far as I can see I'm a puppeteer Trying to control what I can't bring near So I finally stop Let go of the wheel The more I give up The better I feel There's no turning back I've broken the seal The motion I can handle The motion I can handle Do I care too much to leave it alone? There's a narrative I always need to know Maybe it's that I obsess on figuring out Every person, place or thing I've grown to doubt But I finally stop Let go of the wheel The more I give up The better I feel There's no turning back I've brokered the deal The motion I can handle The motion I can handle Stop obsessing on what's not important Stop obsessing on what's not important Stop obsessing on what- And so I give up I give up Tap thrice, blink and look right Side eyed shut the door twice For this one, and that one, or I will fail I finally stop Relinquish the wheel The better I feel I finally stop Let go of the wheel The more I give up The better I feel There's no turning back I've broken the seal The motion I can handle The motion I can handle Once I let it go (I don't have to fear what I don't know) I don't need control