Strange Mr. Gregor

Strange Mr. Gregor in apartment thirteen

He can't keep his mind on his work

It seems that his brain took his arms and his legs

And is wandering down to the store

Strange Mr. Gregor likes his brain too much for his own good

So he takes a backseat to his cerebral cortex

And that's where he stays put

Aha!

"Strange Mr. Gregor, he thinks too much"

Is what his acquaintances say

He postulates, analyzes, contradicts, theorizes

Sits alone and argues with himself

Strange Mr. Gregor likes his brain too much for his own good

It's a sad, sad world where an intelligent man can find more peace in his head than his home

Tell me, Mr. Gregor, is there life on Mars?

I don't really know

Tell me, does it flourish 'round distant stars?

I'm not really sure

Strange Mr. Gregor, can you see the future of society?

No, I can't, but I'll tell you this:

In prepared muffin tins, divide one half

Evenly among eight muffin cups

…What?

Put that in your brown eye!