Closure

So a big part of my life has been chicks

I know I can't lie about that

And if I keep it real, I'll never thought again

And have to write about that

See, word I was still in love when I wrote Slut

Just words, them scars weren't closed up

But since it gave me exposure

It's only right I tell you my closure

Slut

Man, I was so rude to the page

So rude to the extent that

Man, I even used real names

Cherise, she text me once on a mad t'ing

Tara kinda treats me like a germ

And the girl that done the monkey bar t'ing, well

Well, she's just doin' her man

Listen

Not the same one that my last freestyle was about

But love from the west to the south

Thought I was over the girl till I saw her out

And family, I was all shocked

'Cause I've been thinkin' about this girl like everyday

In every way

So, yeah, of course we speak and numbers exchange

And now I'm happy as fuck

'Cause now I'm back with the love of my life

Doin' all kind of shit

Like kissin' on North while it was two o'clock at night

A good guy now, I ain't hittin' whenever

Even crashed my car, spittin' together

You know when the kiss is perfect

Come that puzzle piece is fittin' together

That's when I told her, wait though

Ever doin' this to me, gotta do this right

I'ma tell you all the shit that I've been on the last couple years

There's shit you won't like

But I'ma be honest then

I'ma be rude to the T

I gotta make sure some next girl

Can never come to you about me

And that's when I started talkin'

Man, I told them all of the girls that be

All the problems with me

The one night stands and the girls that I met on IG

Buh, but it was her turn

She said they ain't a dream I can sell you

I'm really my life's been borin'

And there ain't nothin' to tell you

And man, I believe her

Maybe I was naive

Or gassed that the girl I was thinkin' about

For the last four years was by me

And like that feelin' it weren't gone away

And her mum even took us on a holiday

Now I'm deep in the nine, got ease and shit

Couple months I got the key to the crib

But then I got distant though

'Cause I got that iffy vibe like

I be catchin' her out, tellin' silly lies like

If you're my woman, then why I gotta catch you up?

And it's dumb shit

That shit you been even gotta lie about

And this is when I turn into a fuck boy

Man, I can't lie, man the dust went with it

Even though I still love them mad

Somethin', couldn't sip with my spirit

Then record the beautiful ones

No attention, her time had none of it

I'm all type to do

Pull up on the late night

Random one, never felt like cuddlin'

That's when I got that phone call though

And you know how it goes like

Blaine, there's something you should know

There's somethin' you should know

I just took a pregnancy test, and look man

It came back positive

Bad man never come have an abortion

Looks like we just sorta get on with it

And me, I can't lie how I acted

All's on loose, when I started backtrackin'

When I heard the word baby, I just panicked

And asked her again, are you sure you wanna have it?

And she said

The doctors told her before that she can't have a baby

So the thought of havin' an abortion

No, no, havin' a youth is all crazy now

Look

See, when a baby ain't planned

There's some stages you go through as man

The first stage is

Nah, she ain't havin' this youth

I gotta talk to her harder

And the second stage is

Look, man, I gotta man up because I wanna be a father

Pull it off, I still told my mother

I'm thinkin' that she's gonna get mad to me

And all she said was Blaine

Do not bring a mad girl in my family

Told my sister but she wasn't havin' it

And right now I'm excited

But anyway, fuck that part

It's the second part that hit me like lightnin'

I got a phone call out of the blue

Like Blaine, where you at?

And can you come 'round?

And I said, now?

And she said now

So I said, fuck it and drove from south

Blew one till I pulled up to the crib

Got in the lift, put a key for the door

And all I could see is her there

With her arms around her belly on the floor

I'm like, yo, baby, tell me what's wrong

She sayin', I bled and my belly keeps hurtin'

I keep phonin' the ambulance

Over and over again but the shit ain't workin'

They pull up in what seems like forever

Me, I'm shocked, I don't know what it means

We get to the hospital, take her blood

Holdin' her hand, waitin' to be seen

And then, some young white lady steps in

She clears her thought, she looks up slow

And says you're no longer pregnant and

Man, it kinda hit me in the worst way 'cause

It happened like three days before my birthday

Now it means I was back on track

But I can't lie, ain't sure I ain't givin' it

'Cause I've got this feelin' sayin' that I can't trust her

And look, man, I can't get rid of her

Man, I got talk to her

I got talk to her

I'ma see you next week

And that's when I talked to her

I picked her up so I can drop at the airport

I said them tires when she can drive

And I'm just there in the passenger seat

And I'm lookin' at her square in the eyes

And I say

What I'm about to say, man, I ain't tryna cuss you

I really wanna make this work

But I feel like I can't trust you

And look, I don't know what it is but

I got a feelin' so deep in my ribs

Months ago you was gonna have my kid

And now I feel that the solution is to

Let me have a look on your phone

It might sound dumb and it might sound young

But let me have a look in your phone

Don't get it twisted, I'm grown

But let me have a look in your phone

I don't see nothin', I'll stop buggin'

We'll get to trustin', we'll blow somethin'

You'll probably be cussin' like

I told you there was nothing in my phone

And word to my life, won't let that go but

Let me have a look on your phone

And then she said no

And I said, what?

I swear, you want me to take you serious

And word, that's what I'm tryna do

So you gotta respect how I'm tryna move

Five years deep, you let that go

Dressed and won't let me look in your phone

She look back with a worried  and scared face

And then she said no

And look, you see that kinda iffy

Man, I let that go so quickly

Still went to the airport just to let her off

And then I put my key right through the letter box, look

What was in her phone, man?

I wouldn't ever know

But nine times out of ten there was the maddest things in her phone

Now I get a phone call two days later

She's like hi

I'm like, what up?

She's like, now you can look through my phone

I'm like, doo, doo, shut up

Three months after I'm in Shoreditch

And I see her cousin

And she pulls me to the side like I wanna talk to you about somethin'

And I'm like, calm, we can step out the bar

And me and you can go speak in the car

And she's like, I don't talk to my cousin no more, man

She takes things kinda far

And I'm like, way there, what you wanna say to me?

And she goes, um

Shit, I don't know how to say this but

I don't really wanna say no dirt

But he was with her

She was chattin' to a couple man

And there was this guy from work and

When she was havin' his kid

She showed up to my crib, 'cause

She weren't sure like

If he was yours or his and

I said, wait there, how do you know

She said, on my daughter's life I know

And I'm only tellin' you because I don't speak to her anymore

And I couldn't care about the cheatin'

But the child shit hit me harder

Man, I got excited and I told my Mum

That I might not have been that father

But, I guess I didn't know that lady

After the miscarriage, shit got crazy

She look back that miscarriage, wha?

I said, yes, she carried my baby

She said, wait there Blaine, are you sure?

I said, I saw her on the floor

We both went to be hospital

And they said that the child wasn't there anymore

And she said

When this happened around the end of Feb

I said, yeah, how you know?

She said, fuck, man these girls are dread

I said, wait what you mean?

She said, on my daughter's life, I'm talkin'

On the middle of February

I took her to get an abortion

See, gal'll fuck like that

Yeah, man fuck up

But man fuck ups, they ain't fuck like that

Are you even clockin' the play?

Saw the miscarriage and her been on the floor was all staged

And then you ask why man so bitter

A man turn into your average ****

Sayin' how you can't trust these women

Trust me boy, and you can't get realer

But if I learn one thing out of this whole thing

You gotta go with your gut

But you ain't gotta take my advice

'Cause I'm just Cadet AKA The Slut

You feel me?

Pain, Cadet, Cadet, Cadet, Cadet, pain

Cadet, Cadet, Cadet, Cadet, Cadet, Cadet, pain