Losing the Plot

Welcome back insomnia

Ushered back into silence only when everyone else is sleeping

And 'cause the city is sleeping

No one ruthless is rushing to get to the front of the line as usual

'Cause I am losing the plot

I am grieving the end of superwoman-ing

I have laid down my cape

As though I haven't risen like a phoenix from a thousand deaths

As though I have not been reborn to notice that

My mission is not dead yet

I'm exhausted midas

Reigniting a hunger that typically fuels those of us still searching for something outside ourselves

'Cause this city bears violence

And everybody is rushing to sob at the podium and thank the ones who loved and exploited wellI

I am losing the plot

I am grieving the end of superwoman-ing

I have laid down my cape

As though I haven't risen like a phoenix from a thousand deaths

As though I haven't been reborn to notice that my mission is not dead yet

The light at the end of the tunnel

The one I have always prayed for is a train

At a hundred miles per hour

And it promises to break my bones if I don't stand still

Rip my heart out ambition mill or bust

With my relevance in dust

And I am losing the plot

I am grieving the end of superwoman-ing

I have laid down my cape

As though I haven't risen like a phoenix from a thousand deaths

As though I haven't been reborn to notice that my mission is not dead

As though this fame and pressure has not been a vice around my head

As though my heart has not kept all my cynicism under the mattress

And I can't keep it up

Though the fire is not out yet

I am losing the plot