When I'm Five (Home Demo)

When I'm five

I will wash my face and hands all by myself

When I'm five

I will chew and spit tobacco like my grandfather Jones

'Cause I'm only four and five is far away

When I'm five

I will read the magazines in mommy's drawer

When I'm five

I will walk behind the soldiers in the May day parade

'Cause I'm only four and grown ups walk too fast

Yesterday was a horrid day 'cause Raymond kicked my shin

And mummy says if I am good, she'll let me go to school in August

Daddy shouted loud at mommy and I dropped my toast at breakfast

And I laughed when Bonzo licked my face because it tickled

I wonder why my daddy cries and how I wish that I was nearly five

When I'm five

I will catch a butterfly and eat it and I won't be sick

When I'm five

I lurk in puddles, laugh in church and marry my mom

And I'll let my daddy do the washing up

If I close one eye, the people on that side can't see me

I get headaches in the morning and I rode on Freddie's tricycle

And everywhere was funny when I ran down to the sweetshop

Then I fell and bleed-ed up my knee and everybody sob at me

I saw a photograph of Jesus and I asked him if he'd make me five

When I'm five

When I'm five

When I'm five